Left 4 Dead 2? More Like Left 4 Dead WOOOOO, amirite?

For my secular gift giving annual occurrence day, I was lucky enough to be given a shiny new copy of Left 4 Dead 2, the sequel to, surprise surprise, Left 4 Dead. There wasn’t a lot of love for this game seeing as Valve managed to release it approximately a year after the original, very quick turn around for a game. As such, people presumed that the new content could simple have been released as a patch or DLC, rather than a whole game. Even once people started playing it, they claimed that the changes made to the game weren’t deserving of a whole new disc, that it felt like a rushed expansion, not a whole game. To those people, I cry from the hills “BULLSHIT! BULLSHIT!” and this is why.

• The New Special Infected: In addition to the existing rosters of the hunter, smoker, boomer, tank and witch, three new special infected join the line up. There’s the incredible fast and very disruptive charger. As his name implies, he charges through the survivors, knocking them aside and grabbing one of them in the process, who he’ll proceed to to smash into the ground. Then you have the jockey, a rather infuriating spec-infec who jumps onto a survivor, then rides them about like a cheap whore on speed. This can often lead to you being corralled into either a hoard of infected or even worse, into a boomer or spitter. The spitter is either the sister, or worse, girlfriend, of the boomer. As her name implies, she spits (she defo doesn’t swallow). And her spit happens to be rather corrosive persistent acid that can be used as a denial of ground attack. In addition to these three newcomers, the witch now wanders around during the day (oh joy) and some of the classic spec-infec now have new skins more suitable of the deep south.
• Speaking of deep south, that brings me to the new levels and the new story, which you can actually call a story! Unlike L4D where each campaign was styled like a zombie B-movie, with only the vaguest of plot threads connecting them, L4D2 has an actual story with connection between campaigns and reoccurring characters. The levels are also very beautiful, featuring day and night cycles, weather and dynamic routes controlled by the improved AI.
• The biggest improvement is the portfolio of weapons. In the first game, there was a very limited selection of armaments, 9 in total (staring shotgun, machine gun and pistol, upgrade shotgun, machine gun, hunting rifle, second pistol, moltov and pipe bomb). In L4D2 I have actually not been able to count the weapons. There are multiple types of each class plus a new throw able, boomer bile, which makes infected turn on each other. There’s also the adrenaline (increases speed and ability to shake off infected), incendiary and explosive ammo (which you deploy so other survivors can upgrade their weapons with new ammo) a grenade launcher, and best of all, MELEE WEAPONS!!!!
• Melee weapons are the best new feature of the game! I cannot convey how much fun they are! I was cackling with joy as I decapitated zombies with a katana and making chainsaw noises as I sliced and diced (vading ding ding ding [chainsaw noise]) There are eight melee weapons in total; cricket bat, machete, guitar, chainsaw, katana, crowbar, fire axe and police baton. If you’re lucky enough to get the code from Game (in the UK) you’ll also have the limited edition baseball bat (but this doesn’t count to the use all melee weapon achievement). I love the fact each weapon has its own charm, The katana and machete both slice and dice, separating undead from undead body. The cricket bat is a nice little tip of the hat to Shaun of the Dead and the chainsaw is just too much fun to explain.
• Then you have the new survivors, new game mode and loads of immersive little features and ways of playing through the campaign. Gone is the method of run and gun, run and gun, stand and gun. You now have to collect items, turn off alarms, run gauntlets and basically play a much more realistic zombie apocalypse.

Well, that’s the end of my love for Left 4 Dead 2, all you people who trash talk it, you fucking phail! Peace! Lulz

My Dream Facebook/Twitter App

I love using facebook and twitter from my mobile phone. Since I got an unlimited data plan, I’ve been tweeting everywhere, from bed, from the toilet, from a car, everywhere. But there is a common problem; none of the twitter apps I’ve used, or even any I’ve seen, are perfect, lol. There are some features I’d love to see.

Firstly, cross-swiping would be nice. Many twitter apps feature side by side screens for time line, mentions, direct messages etc. I would like to see the ability to make a horizontal left the right or right to left swipe gesture, in order to transition between those screens.

Second, I’d love decent picture support. Not just twitpic, but a system by which I upload a photo, select which service to upload to (twitpic, flickr, facebook) and for facebook upload, which album and tags, not a mobile upload folder. After you select the service, you can choose to make a tweet about uploading the picture (either using a twitpic address or a tinyurl for other services).

My third dream feature would be automatic url reduction. You enter a full url, either in facebook or twitter, then the app detects the url and automatically converts it to a tinyurl address.

Geotagging and geotweeting integration would be great as that is a feature I’ve been dying to explore. It would be nice to be able to geotag a photo when uploading so other people can see where I took it, as well as the same for tweets. It would be useful to be able make a tweet about the quality of a restaurant and have the tweet contain the location of the eatery in question.

A Rant About Christmas

But first, a disclaimer. As a general rule, I love christmas. I've had my depressing festive periods in the past, as has everyone, but usually it rocks, especially last year.
Second Disclaimer, I am not prejudice against any form of religious denomination........But I am getting sick to death of christians at christmas!

Let me explain with some detail about the crux of my argument. Firstly, I am not debating the validity of the hypothesis that a child called, or later known as, Jesus, was born. Whether or not he was the offspring (and yet simultaneously the same entity as) and arbitrary deity is a discussion for another day. But Jesus WAS NOT BORN IN DECEMBER!!!! He was not born in winter, he was born in spring/summer. Common sense would dictate that two thousand years ago, a child born in the winter in the middle east would probably die. Christmas would have originally been celebrated in the middle of the year. But why, you may ask, do we celebrate it in December, on the 25th? Well, it was because the christians decided to do something very sneaky, they decided to cash in on a much more popular PAGAN festival, one known as Yule (and many other names)

Yule falls on the Winter Solstice, the shortest day of the year, which by the Gregorian Calender, is the 21st of December. Some traditions of Yule included:

• Bringing an evergreen tree into the home so that the life it has through the cold winter months may be passed onto to the household
• Decorating the tree so that the tree nymphs won't be upset for being disturbed.
• Placing candles on the tree to keep said nymphs warm
• Stringing up mistletoe and ivy in honour of the Horned God (the male aspect of the bi-gendered god/goddess, NOT THE DEVIL). The Horned God rules over autumn/winter, then dies and is reborn as the Goddess for spring/summer.
• Honouring the image of the Robin as a messenger of the Horned God
• Taking the last log from the fire and keeping it for next year so there will always be fire wood, a 'Yule Log' you might say.

These all sound mighty familiar don't they? That's because 99% of 'Christ'mas is taken from Yule. I am not for one second arguing for a paganisation or secularisation of xmas, I don't mind christians thinking it's all their idea. What I do mind though is people making christmas ALL ABOUT CHRISTIANITY. I was in the bullring, watching some bangra dancers performing for a children's charity. They weren't doing it for christmas, they were taking advantage of the christmas shopping. But I heard one bigot say "Christmas is about Christians" and this got me so angry. Also on facebook, I've seen groups called "Lets put the Chirst back into Christmas" I for one thought that Christmas was about peace, love and good will to ALL men, whether they're black, white, yellow, christian, Hindu, Pagan, Wicca, Muslim or atheist. Yes, maybe other faiths are to blame for getting 'offended' at 'christian' imagery (Quick list of all the typical christian imagery:

• Star (kinda, stars are also an import pagan imagery as there is the winter star, believed to be the sign of the Horned God)
• Nativity Scene (in all fairness, biggest inaccuracy about xmas, as the bible never says Jesus was born in a stable or anywhere near animals.
• Even the 'angel' on the tree is originally a fairy, a poppet of a tree nymph.

So really, it's more that people are just trying to homogenise everything and the knee jerk reaction is to become bigoted. It's two terrible extremes and I wish everyone would SHUT THE FUCK UP and maybe just go for second "Well, thanks pagans for giving us the christmas we have today"

GamerPost #03 Uncomfortable Choices

As I look at those often mean little numbers in the bottom right of my left display, sitting happily at the end of my task bar, they tell me that it is now 10:42 am. Now, to me, that’s pretty offensive as it stands, because I am normally not up before 11 on a day off university (I prefer to start late, work late). But this morning it’s almost a little worse, for I have been up since 7:20am! Why, you may ask, well it’s a bizarre little story.

I, as a man who enjoys the little things, like a warm duvet, a soft pillow, and the feel of being asleep, do not have the time for midnight launches. The same can be said for supermarket chain Sainsbury's, who not having 24 hour store opening, decided on another, more appealing way to drawing in the customers to purchase the latest Call of Duty game, Modern Warfare 2 (Technically Call of Duty 4: Modern Warfare 2, think Final Fantasy X 2). They would be selling the game, RRP £55, for cheap. How cheap you ask? Not for £45, not for £35 but for £26! Let me put that into perspective, you can still buy Modern Warfare 1 for £30 new, or £27 pre-owned (Play.com, GAME.co.uk). That’s right, you can buy the most anticipated game of the year for CHEAPER than it’s 2 year old predecessor.

So, last night as I was going to sleep, I was debating whether to make the purchase. I decided to leave it to fate; I would wake up whenever I wake up, call the nearest store and see if they had any left. If they didn’t, no harm, no foul and I save £26. If they did, well I’d get a copy and make a huge saving. Best laid plans of men and mice.

I wake up this morning at 7:20am, feeling disturbingly refreshed (I got an early night last night, before midnight that is) and thought ‘fuck it!’. I through on some clothes (I don’t think they would serve me naked), jumped on the next train, and literally within 20 minutes I was standing out side Sainsbury's at 7:40 in the morning. And even better, I was at the front of a 20 something meters long queue! Win! 20 minutes later the shutters start to rise and I am not kidding, grown men and even a few grown women were scooting under the shutter before it was even 2 meters off the ground. Sainsbury’s was organised, well prepared and well stocked and within 10 minutes, I had my copy.

Now I must comment that something funny did occur as I was queuing. A number of my senior members of the community, whom I will refer to as ‘old codgers’, or something of similar effect, from now on, made some rather disparaging comments about the folly of queuing for a ‘silly game’ that early in the morning. I thought this was rather hypocritical, seeing as they were there equally early to do their shopping. Now I have worked in a supermarket, and these ‘early rises’ are a bizarre bunch. They will be outside a supermarket, up to ten minutes before opening, every week, or in the more extreme circumstances, every DAY, like clockwork to get their paper, fruit and meat etc. It’s as if they’re worried that the stuff we have in stock everyday like clockwork will sell out if they’re not there at 8am sharp. And they called us stupid? Some people.

But yes, back on topic. I’m not going to spoil anything for the game for those who have yet to play it, but I do offer one word of warning, if you are easily offended, disturbed or upset, you may want to enable the option to skip the disturbing content, if only as a fail-safe. This is for one reason; at a point early on in the game, you kill civilians, and a lot of them. I’m not talking insurgents dressed as civilians, or even civilian law enforcement. You kill unarmed, non-combatant civilians who run screaming for their lives. This was a particularly upsetting moment for me, if only because the realisation came after I had started pulling the trigger.
As many of my fellow first person shooter fans out there will agree, if you’re playing a game and the AI starts shooting, you automatically start shooting the same targets. This is because the AI is supposed to know what it’s doing. It’s programmed to advance the plot, or keep the heat off you so you can do so. Now in the above situation, I wouldn’t be lying if I said I simply started shooting because the AI was doing so. A few seconds later I realised who I was shooting at, and it hit me. At one point I actually fell back to the rear of the group, shooting those who were already shot and dying, if only to put them out of their misery. I even felt the slightest bit nauseous. But it did make me think. Not to ruin the plot, but this scene revolved around one government doing (or allowing) something terrible for a greater good (in theory). And for a few seconds afterwards, I sat and thought “you know, I wouldn’t be surprised if something similar hasn’t happened before”. And it’s at that moment, when you have those thoughts, that you lose another little piece of your faith in humanity. I don’t begrudge Infinity Ward for inserting the scene. They could’ve made it a cut scene and everyone who watched it would be all “oooh, those evil terrorists, lets go get them, Hoo Haa!”. But no, IW made us play it, and they made us think, and feel, and (I really hope) feel shit about it. Because the world is full of people, people in power, who make the hard choices, that have terrible consequences, for that fantastic ideal of 'the greater good’.

That’s all I really wanted to say. Thank you for reading this little post. Thank you Infinity Ward for making me think. And thank you Activision (the games publishers) for doing this.

GamerPost #02 The Demo Edition

Okay, this week I finally got Xbox live gold back on for my gamertag (Davedamon for those who want to know) and can you guess one of the first things I did? (No, it wasn’t insult some 12 year old American kids sexuality and/or mother). I went demo downloading! Three demos in fact. And here they are!

Ghostbusters: The Game
This just isn’t a game, it’s an interactive sequel to the film series! Yes, this is the blessed Ghostbusters 3, featuring all the voices including Dan Aykroyd, Harold Ramis, Bill Murray, and Ernie Hudson. It’s all their, the humour, the familiar ghost busting technology (and you can cross the stream, or not!). Graphically it’s engaging and realistic, but with a subtle undertone of stylizing. I do now want the full game, and as such it has gone on my Christmas wish list ^_^

Brütal Legend
Brütal Legend (umlauts compulsory) is basically Jack Black – The Game. And that’s not a bad thing. I couldn’t get a good bead on the gameplay from the demo, seeing as it’s supposedly an action RTS, but all I got from the demo is action.
The important part is the humour. Even the demo was packed to the brim with metal references, witty one liners and quotes a plenty (“DECAPITATION!!!! Now to teach of the thing we call ‘French kissing’). Again, this deservedly earns a place on my wish list, and I hope I get to metal it up with Eddy Riggs this festive period.

Left4Dead 2
Now anyone who has read my previous post on zombies will understand why I’m so excited about this game. Take the original Left4Dead (which is AMAZING) and add the following

• New special infected such as the Spitter and Jockey
• Melee weapons (chainsaw doesn’t do it for you? How about an axe, or a katana, or a FREAKING ELECTRIC GUITAR!)
• Uncommon common infected, including fire proof hazmat and bullet proof SWAT zombies and clown zombies
• A new plot and 4 new survivors

This game basically has everything that made the original great and then some. I can see me and Viv sinking many an hour into this baby and it’s the only demo to stay on my system until I get the full title.

So, that’s really all for now.

Wait, LOOK OUT!

BOOMER!

FilmPost #02 New Moon Soundtrack – No Blue October?

Okay, first things first, disclaimer! I am NOT a Twilight fan. I read the books when I used to work at WH Smiths because they were free and I had read all the Discworld and Warhammer 40K novels. That and there was so much hype at the time. I’m not going to do a book review here, but there weren’t that impressive and it was one of the few books where I hated the lead character so much.

But the important thing is that I’m a HUGE Blue October fan (as in all the albums, signed album and poster, met the band and seen them live 3 times, including twice in the same tour). What, you may ask, does this have to do with Twilight? Well, specifically it is regarding New Moon, the second book in the saga which is very soon coming out in cinemas.

You see, Stephanie Mayer is, like myself and many other people with good taste, a Blue October fan. In fact, the lead singer Justin Furstenfield did an acoustic tour with Stephanie to promote the last book, Breaking Dawn. It was during this tour, well before even the first film came out, the Stephanie stated that while she was writing New Moon, a particular Blue October song, Hate Me, was in her mind when she writing the scene where Edward, the most annoying vampire ever, leaves Bella, the most annoying character ever, full stop.

Now I must explain these two components; the song and scene in the book. I’ll start with the book first. The scene in question features Edward leaving Bella to go to Italy because he believes that being around her, what with the desire to suck….her blood…would be dangerous for her (will ignore the fact that during the only scene in the book so far where a vampire tries to drink her blood, it’s actually Edward who protects her). He tries to get her to forget about him, stop loving him, do anything to move on (I know, so emo, if it wouldn’t be so completely redundant, I’d say for him to just get it over with and slit his wrists)

Now this scene was written with the song Hate Me, by Blue, in mind. The song tells of a guy, possible Justin himself, who even though being in love with a woman, wants her to hate him enough not to love him back. (“Hate me today, hate me tomorrow, hate me for all the things I didn’t do for you) This way, she can leave him so she doesn’t have to suffer their destructive relationship (“an ounce of peace is all that I want for you, will you never call again”). Even though he knows this is for the best, it still tears him apart (“I have to block out thoughts of you so I don’t loose my head”). Now this song is incredibly powerful and emotive, possibly what I’d call an anti-love song. Not a song about hate, but a song about love that is totally and utterly depressing.

Now, although the song is quite dark and mature, it was clearly the source of inspiration for the key scene in the book, and now film, and as such I was incredible disappointed that it won’t be making the sound track for the film in any shape or form. This is not because I plan on purchasing or even downloading said soundtrack. Instead, it would be great to see Blue October getting more publicity, even on a sound track for an annoying tweeny film.

Now this isn’t all. There’s even another song that is just as appropriate, instead for another character, Jacob, who is in love with Bella as well (I don’t get it, she’s an annoying, whiney little cow). This premise is simple, the song is called Should Be Loved and is about just that, a guy who is suffering from unrequited love even though he’s given everything to this girl (“I should be loved by you, that I know is true, I can’t breath when you’re around”)

They could even put it on the album like this:

2. Hate Me (Edwards Song)
5. Should Be Loved (Jacobs Song)

These brilliant bands need their mainstream break. I don’t believe that a great artist should be your little secret, a private members club. If you love a band, if you love their music, you should do all you can to share it, get it out there.

End of rant!

Why I Love the Undead

Halloween has come and gone, and so have the various monsters and fantastic creatures. There were werewolves, pirates, ninjas, mad scientists and (thanks to Twilight) plenty of vampires, groan. But I will always have a special place in my heart for the walking undead, the living impaired, the flesh eating hoard. You see, I love me some zombies.

Now don’t get me wrong, I’m not talking necrophilia. I don’t want to be a zombie, or have a zombie girlfriend or even have one of my friends become a zombie. To be more precise, I love KILLING zombies. Give me a shotgun, a chainsaw or even a trusty cricket bat and I’ll just go to town busting zombie heads.

You could probably tell this from looking at my windows media film genre list. I have action, horror, fantasy and zombie. Yes, that’s right, zombie films get their own genre. And it makes sense really considering all the zombie films I’ve seen/watched:

• Night of the Living Dead (original)
• Dawn of the Dead (original)
• Land of the Dead
• Diary of the Dead
• Night of the Living Dead (remake)
• Dawn of the Dead (remake)
• Day of the Dead
• The Zombie Diaries
• Dead Set
• Rec
• Quarantine (American Rec remake)
• Shaun of the Dead
• Zombieland
• 28 Days Later
• 28 Weeks Later
• Planet Terror
• Resident Evil
• Resident Evil: Apocalypse
• Resident Evil: Extinction
• Resident Evil: Degeneration

That is quite a list of zombie films, but don’t get me wrong, I didn’t like them all. Land of the Dead, which I refer to Zombie 90210, is quite dire! If I was going to talk about favourites, it’d be more like an awards ceremony:

Best Zombie Series – Dead Set
Best British Zombie Film – The Zombie Diaries
Best American Zombie Film – Dawn of the Dead (remake)
Best British Zombie Comedy – Shaun of the Dead
Best American Zombie Comedy – Zombieland
Best Zombie Film That’s Not Really About Zombies – 28 Days Later
Best Spanish Zombie Film – Rec

As you can see, I like me some undead films! I couldn’t just pick one as a favourite so I’d have to have a zombie night instead!

And then we have zombie games! First, I’m going to admit something. I’m a zombie fan and I have never played Resident Evil (bad zombie fan, bad). But one of my favourite games for playing with my girlfriend (who also loves zombie films) is the amazing Left4Dead (and Left4Dead 2, yay) It plays exactly how a zombie game should play. Shotguns? Check! Hoards? Check! Creepy moments of suspense and tension? Check check CHECK!

So yeah, in short, I love me some undead!

And remember, Bleep Bloop!