Nerf Zombie War–Rules

Okay, since getting my latest nerf gun, the Stampede ECS, I’ve been dying to ‘play’ with it in a competitive scenario. As such, I’ve concocted the following rules for a Nerf Zombie war. The idea is to act out a zombie outbreak using nerf guns. So here’s the rules:

Equipment
Red strips of fabric (for armbands)
Permanent marker (to number armbands)
A phone with lots of credit/unlimited free texts

Additionally, each player must have:
A Nerf gun of some kind (obviously)
Ammunition
Soft foam weapons for close combat
A phone, with which to receive the game messages

Lock and load!

Prologue
Before the game begins, an inventory is conducted for all players, the game area is defined, safe zones designated and a time limit set. It is recommended that areas where none players congregate, such as libraries, lecture rooms, or other such public locations, be labelled ‘No Go’ for anyone playing.
All players are given a red numbered armband that is tied onto the right upper arm. It must be tied with a bow, with plenty of excess so that it may be easily pulled off. This will become clear as to why later.
Players may be armed with whatever Nerf guns they can beg/steal/borrow, along with all the ammunition they can carry. It is recommended that you a) keep a count of your ammunition and b) don’t bring more than you can afford to lose, as there is a chance of darts going missing, especially as you fight for your life. It is also a good idea to establish if exchanging/gifting/inheriting weapons is permitted. Additionally players may carry soft foam weapons, but care is to be exercised when using these.
All players then must disperse and find a ‘safe’ spot from which to start the game. Once an allotted amount of time has passed, say 5 or 10 minutes, a text message is sent out to all players with a random number. Whoever is wearing the armband with this number becomes Patient Zero

Characters

Patient Zero
Patient Zero is the malevolent plague bearer, the source of the outbreak. Their goal is to infect as many people as possible with the deadly plague they carry

Infectious – Patient Zero, or P0 from now on, is the only survivor who can remove armbands, thus infecting other survivors. P0 may infect a survivor in one of two ways:
1) P0 may kill another survivor first, using a nerf or foam weapon, and then remove their armband. They may then keep the armband and the player comes back as a shambler.
2) P0 may attempt to remove a survivors armband while they are still alive, without getting killed by the survivor in the process. If they succeed, the player immediately ties their armband to their left arm and comes back as a runner.

Regeneration -  If P0 is killed by a survivor, they use one of their armbands in their possession to come resurrect. If they are wearing their last armband (the one they started with) they instead come back as shambler, but should they take an armband from a survivor, they may once again regenerate into P0

Hard to Kill -  Unlike other zombies, you cannot execute P0 in order to prevent him resurrecting. The only way to kill P0 is to kill him while ‘alive’ in his human form once for each armband he carries, then kill him as a shambler.

Anonymous -  Any player infected by P0 must not reveal the identity of P0 to another player. They may however kill P0 should they encounter them again if they re-enter the game as a survivor.

Zombie
Zombies are the living dead, the restless deceased. They are neither truly dead or alive and hunger for flesh. They are highly infectious and will turn anyone them come into contact with. There are three types of zombies:

Know your enemy OR be all you can be!

Shambler (0 armbands) – These are slow moving, but fairly resilient zombies that represent the most common form of undead. They can only walk at a s shambling pace (hence their name) but can only be killed with a head shot. It takes a shambler 10 seconds to open a closed door and they cannot open any door with a latch, lock or other obstruction.

Runner (1-4 armbands) – Once a shambler has consumed enough flesh, it begins to adapt in order to hunt more prey. Its metabolism accelerates, but it becomes more vulnerable. A Runner can move at a running pace, but they can be killed by a head or chest shot. Runners are capable of regenerating and can open a door that isn’t locked or obstructed in 5 seconds.

Predator (5 armbands) – The most advanced and deadly zombie, the predator not only is tougher, but also more intelligent. Any zombie that accumulates 5 armbands becomes a Predator. A Predator may run, can only be killed with headshots, can open locked or obstructed doors instantly, and most disturbingly are capable of using close combat weapons. Predators cannot accumulate more than 5 armbands, any armbands they do collect are lost.

Zombie Special Rules

Infection
A zombie can infect a player by removing their armband from their right arm. Once a zombie has done so, the player becomes a Shambler 60 seconds after being infected, and the infecting zombie gets to keep the armband, allowing them to evolve into a Runner or even a Predator. Armbands cannot be transferred between zombies, but can be collected by a player performing an execution.

Evolution
When a zombie infects a survivor and collects their armband, the zombie wears their acquired armband on their left arm to show their evolution. This is important for identifying Runners and Predators.

Regeneration
When a zombie is ‘killed’ or downed, if they have any armbands, they may remove them in order to regenerate. If a Runner regenerates with only one armband, it becomes a Shambler again. When a Predator regenerates, it becomes a Runner.

Survivors
Survivors are the last bastion of humanity, standing against the waves of undead. They must fight, or be food.

Weapons – Survivors have to arm themselves in order to survive. Permitted weapons include Nerf/Foam dart guns and foam/soft weapons. When using dart guns, headshots may be required, but try to avoid the eyes. As for close combat weapons, don’t be too boisterous and be careful. ‘Pistol whipping’ is allowed, but it must be done safely, in a more role play fashion.

Execution – When a survivor puts a zombie down, there is a chance they may regenerate and come back. In order to prevent this, a player may execute a downed zombie. This can only be done 30 seconds after the zombie has been downed and requires the player walking over, simulating a headshot, and removing the zombies armbands. This must be done once per armband, with 30 seconds between each armband. The survivor may then keep any armbands they accumulate this way, which are important for rescuing civilians.

Friendly Fire – While there is no friendly fire per say, a stray shot is harmless, survivors may intentionally kill their team mates, either as an act of mercy or treachery. If a survivor does so, they may collect their fallen teammates armband.

Look after your ammo and your ammo will look after you!

Civilians
Civilians are the unarmed, disorganised, panicked and scared masses. Any player that dies either as a shambler, or without being infected (i.e., headshot while alive) becomes a civilian and must head to the nearest safe zone.

Safe Zones -  Safe zones are designated areas where civilians gather until rescued. Zombies may not enter safe zones and survivors may only enter them in order to rescue civilians, and may not use their weapons while doing so.

Rescue – If a survivor has spare armbands, they may give them to any civilians he finds at a safe zone, allowing them to re-enter the game as survivors. Optionally, they may even chose to re-arm the rescued survivors.

Game Rules

It is considered good etiquette to collect any loose ammo you find, even if it was used to shoot at you. It is sensible to conduct a pre-game inventory of each players weapons, ammunition and accessories, so that hopefully everyone will get back what they started with, although loses are to be expected. Don’t bring more than you can afford to lose.

If a survivor is turned and does not wish to lend their weapon to another player, they may instead carry it with them (remaining in character appropriate to their zombie status) to a designated drop off point. This will usually be the point where the game started and where non-playing members of the game will wait. A zombie carrying their weapon cannot infect survivors and is considered a shambler for all purposes. Once they are rescued, they may make their way to the drop off point to collect their weapon, but this is not without its risks.

Game Modifiers
Game modifiers are spontaneous changes to the rules that can modify the game significantly. With the exception of ‘The Cure’, all modifiers and revealed by a mass text message sent to all players. It wise for the purpose of timing to make sure all players have the same time at the start of the game.

The Cure -  “The Cure” is a rare green armband placed somewhere in the designated gameplay area that prevents the wearer from from being turned. Instead, when they lose their red armband (they wear both red and green at the same time) they go straight to the safe zone as a civilian. Additionally, they may cure a survivor of their infection just after they have been turned. This requires the survivor to have a spare armband to give to their infected team mate.

The Safe Zone Ain’t So Safe! -  One of the safe zones, chosen at random, is demoted to a regular game zone and is thus open. All players are notified of this by a mass text (see why free texts would be useful?) Once the safe zone is demoted, any civilians in the zone become zombies instantly.

Get to da Choppa’! – A rescue chopper is on the way, but it won’t stick around forever. There is a small window for the survivors to escape. All players are notified of the evac location and time, and any survivor or civilian who makes it to that zone before the allotted time escapes to safety.

A something like this

The Final Stand – This is it, time for humanity to make its last stand against the undead hoards. A final stand location is texted to all players and the survivors must defend it until the last man. The game will then continue until either all the survivors or all the zombies are dead. Any civilians in safe zones become zombies and the usual 60 second wait after infection is waived.

Game ‘Win’ Conditions
Although nobody truly wins in a zombie apocalypse (well, except the zombies maybe), there are certain conditions by which one side or the other may claim a small victory.
After the allotted time has expired or the chopper leaves, the team with the most points (based on the score sheet bellow) is the winner. In the case of Final Stand, the last surviving team is the winner.

Scores – Survivors
2 Points per Survivor
1 Point per spare armband in possession of the survivors
5 Points for being in possession of “The Cure” armband
10 Points for killing P0
5 Points per Survivor or Civilian who escapes on the chopper

Scores – Zombies
1 Point per Shambler
2 Points per Runner
3 Points per Predator
1 Point per armband in possession of the zombies
10 Points if P0 is alive

Well, there we go. Hopefully all you living dead lovers and Nerf nuts out there will get to try out these rules for a bit of playful Armageddon! Post in the comment section with any feedback, questions or suggestions! And happy hunting.

MMXI Week 7–MCM Telford 2011

So Saturday morning we woke up early, threw ourselves into Wessies car and begun the drive to Telford for MCM Midlands 2011. I had my costume in tow, which you may have already seen in parts. Here it is before I put it on:

And here I am wearing it outside the International Center:

The convention was an amazing experience, especially as it was my first time in Cosplay. Everyone was so nice and it was so weird having people ask to take my photo! I saw some amazing costumes including a Sonic team;

Some amazing Bleach cosplay;

And one of my favourite outfits, cardboard storm trooper;

There were so many awesome costumes, so I’m going to have to do awards for three categories; video game, anime/manga and film/comic book. First, best video game cosplay:

Third Runner Up

Medic, Heavy and Scout from Team Fortress 2

Second Runner Up

Desmond and Two Altairs from Assassins Creed

First Runner Up

Link and Midna from Twilight Princess

And First Place

Faith from Mirrors Edge

I liked the Faith costume the most because of its simplicity and accuracy. She just looked the part naturally.

Now for the best anime/mange costumes:

Third Runner Up

Giselle from Enchanted

Second Runner Up

The Flash

First Runner Up

The Goddamn Batman

And First Place

Kick Ass from, well, Kick Ass.

Just an amazing costume that looks like he walked off set.

Finally, the best Anime/Manga cosplays.

Third Runner Up

Grimmjow Jaggerjack from Bleach

Second Runner Up

Sajin Komarmura, 7th Division Captain, from Bleach

First Runner Up

Nappa, Goku and Frieza from Dragon Ball Z

And First Place

Super Sayan Goku from Dragon Ball Z

I loved this costume simply for the wig, it looks so perfect. He could have done without maybe so much foundation, but that’s just a minor complaint.

Aside from the costumes, there were some great stalls, including two Nintendo stands, one for the somewhat underwhelming 3DS, and another for various Nintendo games, which I didn’t really interact much with. The retailers were quite homogenous with a lot of the same stuff on sale at each stand. The two that stood out the most was the Spit Like This/Smell Your Mum t-shirt stand and the Magic the Gathering card stand, where I found these amazing cards to complete my Myrcraft deck:

Can you see where I’m going with this?

That’s 3 Masters Call from Mirrodin Besieged, 2 Palladium Myr, 1 Myrsmith, 2 Myr Propagators and 4 Myr Galvanisers. I’ve been dying to get hold of these cards and they make for a devastating combo of infinite Myr tokens.

All in all, it was a fantastic day and I’m so glad I went. I enjoyed it even more that I was with Viv, Vinki and Wessie. Being in costume gave me a sense of belonging that I’ve not had before. I’m totally planning on going to MCM London in May, with some additions to my costume, I may even try my hand at the masquerade!

Here’s a youtube video of the pictures I took:

And you can see them all here on my Flickr stream.

Review: Scott Pilgrim Vs. The World

This Tuesday gone, courtesy of the Total Film newsletter (and a little bit of cheeky multi-email amount manipulation) I manged to obtain 4 tickets for an advanced preview of the latest Edgar Wright movie, an adaption of of the Oni Press comic, penned by Brian Lee O’Malley, Scott Pilgrim Vs. The World.

Now before I begin to review in ‘earnest’ I have a confession to make. The first I heard of Scott Pilgrim Vs. The World (henceforth known as Scott Pilgrim) was when I saw the super advanced mega preview trailer from last years Comic Con (I think). It wasn’t until a few months later when I noticed one of my friends had posted on facebook that he was reading the 3rd volume of Scott Pilgrim that I discovered that Scott Pilgrim was a comic series. After a bit of hunting, I managed to procure the first few volumes.

And I promptly fell in lesbians.

I’m not a huge graphic novel fan, simply due to my reading pace. Now, don’t get me wrong, I absolutely love graphic novels, graphic media in general. I would read dozens of different mangas. I have many comic series’ that I desire to enjoy. The problem is the cost to duration ratio. You see, I can read a £8 graphic novel in a single evening, easily. Compare that to a similarly priced book which may last me a week or so, and it just doesn’t seem worth it. But recently I’ve circumvented this by two means. Firstly, I borrow a lot. I’ve been leant V For Vendetta and Watchment, both of which I massivly enjoyed. Secondly, and less legitimately, I’ve been downloading comic book series’ online and viewing them using Comic Rack. Now I know this may make you devout purchasers shudder and scream at me, but understand this, I can’t afford to buy all the volumes, so it’s either that or I don’t EVER read them. Which means that I will never purchase them in the future (I’m not going to spend money on a graphic novel I don’t love) I have purchased download titles, such as my prized 1st Edition Appleseed complete set and my first few volumes of Gundam 0083. But this is not about the ethics of piracy, not is it about comic books in general. This is about what I thought of Scott Pilgrim vs The World (the film). Lets get started with the good:

Lowest Common Denominator? Screw Em: When you have a film based on a previous piece of niche media, be it a comic book, a video game or a book, there is often the temptation to water down the original source material so those not indocrinated into the brotherhood don’t feel alienated. This happens mainly with video games, so seeing as Scott Pilgrim is heavily video game influenced, this was an ever present worry. But worry not my friends, Edgar Wright knows what he is doing. Just as he seemed to make Shuan of the Dead for zombie fans, he made Scott Pilgrim straight up for fans of the comic. That’s not to say that someone who hasn’t read the series won’t enjoy it. I went with my girlfriend, her sister and her cousin, none of which had read the comic, and they all thoroughly enjoyed themselves. In fact, her cousin laughed the loudest out of the whole theatre.

Best Graphics Ever: I had my doubts that the film would be able to encapsulate the comic/video game art style of the original series. There were a lot of elements that work well in ink, but maybe not so well on screen. This wasn’t the case. From game style HUD moments to floating words to caption sound effects (watching Scott bang his head against a lampost with the words Thud, Thud, Thud hanging in the air above him was briliant) The fight scenes were beautifully choreographed and the effects really made them feel vibrant and suitably beat ‘em up!

Made From Concetrate…..d Win!: It’s often hard to distil a story that spans several volumes of graphic novel, over the course of months of even years. But Scott Pilgrim did this well, (but not without a few problems, see bellow). You have two choices in this situation 1) Put the plot on hyper speed to hit every point in 120 minutes, which can leave the audience confused and feeling rushed, or 2) Miss out some elements, which may be critical to side plots, don’t impact on the main story. Scott Pilgrim does a a little of both, which works really well in getting the story over, but does have some negative effects.

And now the Bad:

They Missed That Out: There were a few things missed from the film that were great parts of the comic. Clash at Demonheads drummers robot arm, Scotts 12 months moping about after Ramona leaves, Kim and Scotts history, and even Knives and Kims lesbian kiss! Although these plot points don’t contribute directly to the overall story of defeating 7 evil ex’s, they add flavour and a suitable environment. You don’t need salt and vinegar on your chips, but it’s nice to have it.
The biggest casualty was the ending, where it was revealed that the big band, Gideon Graves, had a collection of 7 ex girlfriends and planned to add Ramona to the collection. And everything was the result of his ability to mess with peoples heads and memories. That was all kind of glossed over in favour of a big bad mind control chip.
Oh yeah, they also forgot his samurai sword battle with Knives ninja father….

Hyperspeed Motion Blur: Sometimes accelerating a plot can make things seem a little rushed. For example, Scott seemed to transition from one Ex-Battle to the next in the space of 30 minutes (in film time) whereas in the comic the span was more like 3 month. This kept the pacing up in terms of visual stimulation, but the way the cast dealt with the pace seemed a little stilted. No one seemed to comment that Scott had fought one ex an hour ago and was now up against another.
But the biggest victim of the increased pace was our hero, Scott Pilgrim. In the comic, he falls in love with Ramona Flowers while he is still dating Knives Chau (who is very much in puppy love with him). Now although this is incredibly douchey, and he gets called out on this douche-bag behaviour, the pacing of the comic means that this issue is resolved, and Scott is punished for his actions, in suitable time. But this isn’t the case in the film. Scott seems to plunge into the full on Ramona relationship and defeating 7 evil exs before Knives name is even mentioned. My girlfriend commented multiple times that she was having trouble empathising with Scott because he was such a douche for cheating on Knives. And I had to agree that the pacing of the film made Scott into a giant douche.

Overall, I freaking loved this film and would definatly see if for a second time (paying to see it that time)

Faithfulness to Original: 7.5/10
Graphical Style: 8/10
Humour: 7/10
Awesomeness: 9/10

Project Lose An Olsen Twin Week 4 or….

So lets get the dull stuff out the way, my exercise crap. This week was a bit of what I’ll call a ‘blip’. On two separate days I ‘over indulged’ By over indulge, I mean one day where I partake in a large amount of funyuns and mountain dew, and another where I again consumed an excess of said funyuns, followed by KFC for dinner, which is never a good plan. But both these transgressions can be put into a suitable context, which I will do so later on.
On a more possitive context, my exercise and fruit consumption has greatly increased. I’m walking an average of 15+ miles a week minimum, with any journey of 2 miles or less being undertaken on foot. As for my sit up reps, I’m up to 50 reps a night, every night (that’s 350 a week!) and hopefully within the next week or so, I’ll be up to 60. I’ve found a devious method into tricking myself that I’m doing less than I am. I break my set down into ever decreasing groups of reps. For example, for 40 reps, I would do 20, rest for a few seconds and have a drink, 10 then rest, 5 then rest, 3, then 2. For my current 50, I’m doing 20, then 15, then 10, then 5. This works very well at helping me pace myself effectively.

Now on to the more awesome parts of my last week. Firstly we have dungeons and dragons on Sunday. Postponed from the previous week due to illness, this session was a prime example in the importance in feedback. By working with my players, I managed to iron out some minor problems they had been having.
There was a hilarious exchange between the five of us about an hour into the session, towards the end of the last encounter. One of my players had received an update to her Magic Missile attack. It now was an instant hit, set damage attack, meaning that minions (high defence, 1 hp monsters) would fall like dominoes before her. She was getting a little drunk with power and in the very last room, she walked in and saw a man in the corner. Literally the first thing she said after I put down the mini was ‘I shoot him with magic missile’ to which the following exchanged took place:

“I use magic missile!”
”Are you sure?”
”Yeah! Blast him with magic missile!”
”Are you really sure?”
”Um, yes? [to other players] Am I sure?”
”What was your quest?”
”Um, kill zombies?!”
Other Player “No, wait, it was to save some guy…..oh! Don’t magic missile him Wessie!”

This lead to a running joke about the groups Wizard using her magic missile to solve every possible problem. Slight cough? Magic missile to prevent spread of infection. Can’t open a jar? Magic missile! Drops her wallet? Magic Missile! It was a running joke for the whole day!

Onto Monday, my girlfriends dad bought us all some really tasty cuts of steak, which combined with tasty chips and long beans, made an amazing dinner. I hadn’t had a rare steak in so long, so it was amazingly tasty!

Then came Tuesday, and the best day of the week by far. You see, I’m signed up with a website that sends people free tickets for advanced screenings of films. And I managed to score a handful of tickets to go see Scott Pilgrim vs. The World! I’ve been psyched about this film for months, since reading the comics and I wasn’t disappointed! I’m not going to spoil it for anyone who hasn’t seen it, but if you ever played an 8bit game, or played video games full stop, or just ever felt awkward and useless in life, this film is for you. I can best describe it as Wayne's World for bitpunk generation! They nailed the casting, the key plot points, everything! SEE THIS FILM!

THAT IS ALL

My Dream Facebook/Twitter App

I love using facebook and twitter from my mobile phone. Since I got an unlimited data plan, I’ve been tweeting everywhere, from bed, from the toilet, from a car, everywhere. But there is a common problem; none of the twitter apps I’ve used, or even any I’ve seen, are perfect, lol. There are some features I’d love to see.

Firstly, cross-swiping would be nice. Many twitter apps feature side by side screens for time line, mentions, direct messages etc. I would like to see the ability to make a horizontal left the right or right to left swipe gesture, in order to transition between those screens.

Second, I’d love decent picture support. Not just twitpic, but a system by which I upload a photo, select which service to upload to (twitpic, flickr, facebook) and for facebook upload, which album and tags, not a mobile upload folder. After you select the service, you can choose to make a tweet about uploading the picture (either using a twitpic address or a tinyurl for other services).

My third dream feature would be automatic url reduction. You enter a full url, either in facebook or twitter, then the app detects the url and automatically converts it to a tinyurl address.

Geotagging and geotweeting integration would be great as that is a feature I’ve been dying to explore. It would be nice to be able to geotag a photo when uploading so other people can see where I took it, as well as the same for tweets. It would be useful to be able make a tweet about the quality of a restaurant and have the tweet contain the location of the eatery in question.

GeekPost #02 The Dollhouse Edition

And in this post, we cover the entire first season of Joss Whedons Dollhouse, staring Eliza Dushku…

The relationship between me and Dollhouse wasn’t love at first sight. About 3 months ago, after reading favourable things about the series from various sites, I downloaded the first few episodes, starting with the unaired pilot, episode 00. I sat down and watched it, and wasn’t impressed. I deleted the remaining episodes and cancelled the torrent.

Fast-forward to about a month ago. I was bored and channel surfing when I noticed Dollhouse was showing on BBC four, and after finding out it was the first episodes, I thought I’d give it a second chance. This episode wasn’t the pilot I had seen (which is patently obvious, seeing as it was the unaired pilot) but instead the network episode #01. I sat down and was surprisingly impressed. The plot was entertaining and Eliza Dushku’s multi-role acting was quite impressive.

For those who haven’t watched/read anything about Dollhouse, the premise is thus. A corporation has access to a technology that allows the scanning, downloading and uploading of the human psyche, either whole or in parts divisible by memory, personality trait or emotional response. The corporation, operating out of the titular ‘Dollhouse’ uses this technology to fashion ‘Dolls’, individuals who have (mostly) volunteered for one reason or another for a five year period, into the perfect person for needs of the client. This could either be the kinkiest lover, the best hostage negotiator or even in one case, the older version of an abused girl who has managed to overcome the emotional baggage that the girl in question is still struggling with, serving as a role model of hope.

When not ‘active'’ on engagements, the dolls remain in a bliss state of childlike innocents, deprived of fears, complex emotions or other such burdens of normal day to day life. The series deals with the various engagements the dolls are sent on, the implications of alleged ‘voluntary slavery’ and the devolving complications of the dolls remerging personalities.

I really enjoyed this series, both for it’s episodic stories, normally following Dushku’s character Echo, and the ongoing plot. Dollhouse is cleverly and engagingly written and I am really looking forward to downloading and watching the second series.

Well, that’s all for now, who knows what I’ll post next.

And when there’s no more room in hell, the dead will walk the earth

GeekPost #01 - Smorgasbord Edition

Hey-Lo and welcome to my first geekpost, a personal summary of my experiences with the evil that is geek TV. Because this is my first one, I'll be starting with a few summaries of what I've watched/ been watching

TV

South Park S13E08-11
South park will always have a special place in my heart. It was one of the first truly subversive, adult cartoons I was ever exposed to, and I almost feel that as I have grown and matured, SP has grown with me.
This is never more true than with the latest instalment of season 13. I remember when SP was pure shock value, toilet humour and bad language (I know, how could it get any better you ask?) But as the years pass the and seasons come and go, that dark, sadistic humour has become something deeper, more delicious.
Recent episodes have featured brilliant parodies of the Sixth Sense (Dead Celebrities), wonderful pastiche on pimp culture (Butters' Bottom Bitch) and the frankly brilliant juxtaposition of 'professional' wrestling and theatre (W.T.F). In the latest episode, Whale Whores, we get a true treat. Not only is Cartman singing on Rock Band, continuing Matt and Trey's frequent nods to geek culture, we also get to hear him belting out a brilliant rendition of Lady GaGa's Poker Face. Fantastic!

Big Bang Theory S03E01-05
If I have to recap what has been happening in big bang theory, the greatest geek sitcom ever, then you are in the wrong place. Leave now, find bittorrent and sit down, you've got some work to do.
Season three opened with what I thought would be the death of the show, the main character (Leonard) hooking up with the lead female role (Penny), the unrequited love becoming requited (is that even a real word). Now I had my doubts about this, as I was sure that it would kill a lot of the humour that stemmed from Leonards perpetual failed attempts to woo Penny. But I was gladly wrong. Who knew how many funnies could be extruded from Sheldons commentary on sexual congress, or his attempts to 'condition' Penny now that she is a regular (albeit partially dressed) fixture in their apartment.
Check out the new series for the following highlights:

• Goth Jew Wolowitz
• Pavlovian girlfriend training
• A cricket called Toby
• Hardcore thinking to the song 'Eye of the Tiger'
• Wil Wheaton saying "Game Over, Moonpie'

Flashforward S01E01-06
I can only describe Flashforward as a more forgiving version of Lost. There are plenty of conspiracies, but without the pressing need to avoid dying of dysentery or gangrene or the many other risks of being stranded on a deserted island, the characters actually can do something productive about find out what the hell has happened.
Basically, the entire world blacks out for 2 minutes, 17 seconds, and during that time, everyone (or mostly everyone) sees the future for those 2 mins 17 from about 6 months into the future.
Flashforward raises some great questions about the ideas of predestination. Can we be blamed for a mistake we make in the future? Can it be changed, or does that act of changing it just guarantee its eventuality?
One of the best points of the series is that it approaches the fantastic with a fairly realistic mind set. If the entire world blacked out, then millions of people would die in plane crashes, accidents, you name it. And that's just what happens, and there is a persistent feeling that you're not in the same world as the one me and you know, the one from before the flashforward. Factor in the disparate views people have about the validity of the flashforwards, a divide between those who believe them and those who don't, those who saw a good future and those who saw a shit one, or worse still, those who saw no future at all.
All in all, I'm looking forward to how this plays out. I just hope it doesn't end up like another lost, with a riddle, wrapped in a mystery, wrapped in bullshit, wrapped in tedium.

Stargate Universe S01E01-06
This is definitely my favourite new series of the year. I'm a big fan of the classic stargate movie and the series SG-1 (but not atlantis). But I found that towards the end of SG-1, it started getting too cheesy (if that's possible). There were these big, overarching plots that never really seemed to draw me in. The baddies were fantastically and every week there was a new mystic weapon or unobtainium particle to save the day. It just got tiresome in a Star Trek TNG kinda way.
I am so glad to say that SGU steps away from that. It's darker, grittier, more depressing and, weirdly enough, more real. The basic premise is really simple. A mixed bag of scientists, soldiers and Joe averages escape through a stargate from a research outpost when it comes under attack. The kicker is that the gate they emerge through isn't in where the expect. It's not on a planet in this galaxy, or even in the Pegasus galaxy (the setting of atlantis). It's on an ancient (both in age and design) spaceship in the furthest corner of the galaxy.
So what we have here is the worst group of people possible, unprepared and under equiped, stranded from home, dealing not with aliens and saving the world, but trying to keep the air breathable, find clean water and keep the lights on.
I love the aesthetics of the ship; Destiny. Its alien/steampunk look works really well and appeals to my deep love of all thinks SteamPunk. The characters are much more diverse, with Robert Carlyle playing a great Machiavellian, passive (or not so) aggressive genius of all things ancient.